New & Improved; Week 1 / Issue 1

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What's News, Big Tease

Ever wonder what's going on in LRVT this week? Ever wondered into the thread completely befuddled just like TerrenaAnimula is on a daily basis? Did you think you know LRVT? Not the New and Improved Whammo The Pepper!!! For the Truth About LRVT!!!! A refreshing carbonated drink that doubles as an industrial cleaning agent!!.. But mostly it's the place to find out what's going on with LRVT. Bringing you the news and scandals occurring in your favorite thread. The Pepper. Dedicated to you and some other stuff too. If you want random news stories about LRVT, that's our business! If you want to pay more for it.. that's our business too. Are you still reading this?.. If so here's the news this week. 

Please be advised, images may not be acceptable for all audiences.


The Jalapenos Take a Leap of Faith....but forget to swap ships

Disaster befell Wayward Squirrel team affectionately known as the Jalapenos when they failed to agree on a suitable password demanded by Sir Wall and leaped into the volumes on false hope that their faith would be enough to take them in safety to the bottom. 

While we do not know exactly how all members have fared on the trip down to the bottom, we do know that we heard Lovecraft yelling "I TOLD YOU SO", Witchy yelling "DO IT!" and Tea Roll creaming "GET BACK HERE NAME PENDING OR I'LL HAVE YOUR SCALES!" Members Phoebe, Terrena and Spring are yet to be heard from, but rumor has it they all reached the bottom only slightly worse for the wear. 

Are we surprised by this news? No. Do we think the Jalapenos have a fighting chance in WS? Well, if you ask them, they never lose- only have a disasterously fun time.


Who's Nakkid Now?

Sightings on Aug. 5th, around 2:30pm have come in of Lovecraft being seen around the site with nothing but a table covering her lower bits. Witchy, a close friend had this to say, "I don't really care that LOVECRAFT is naked. I care that SHE HAS NO HAIR ON HER HEAD!" Speculations that Gerty giving up CWs has lead to her decision to swear off clothing in general. Lovecraft has yet to comment.  



The Baby Merlot Name Feud

Emotions ran high last week in the LRVT as various members began to feud over the name of the future Baby Merlot. After member, Tea Roll made the claim that the Baby Merlot and newest member of the LRVT family was to be named after her, there was an uproar as member Chat insisted that the wee one would carry his name instead. The result was no surprise as the long time frenemies (or so they'd like us to believe) spatted back and forth about who's claim was valid. Finally, Merlot herself attempted to squelch the feud saying that she and her spouse had the naming duties well in hand and no one needed to worry. Member Witchy also offered an olive branch suggesting that the new baby could go by Cat Roll to appease both feuding parties.

As of yet, the Pepper has no concrete information on the Real Name of Baby Merlot but we will update you on this situation as soon as anything further develops. While we seek to remain unbiased, may heaven help us if the winning name is Cat Roll.

Secret Stash

On July 18th, a local resident was cleaning out their kitchen broom closet when they came upon the remains of a small, tiny person. The resident was quoted saying, "I haven't cleaned it in so long I've got dead little people in it." The current suspect in the investigation is one, Lovecraft, with the theory that she would hide stuff in the residents closet, so that they would take the fall. She has yet to comment, or if she did we have yet to find it. 




Do you have any stories you'd like to share? Any news we should know about? Please contact either Tea_Roll or Springjoy.

Comments

  1. FriedaAugust 5, 2018 at 8:09 PM

    What a Great Blog! Thanks for posting this news! (it was me, Frieda, who suggested 'Baby Merlot...hee hee)

    ReplyDelete

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